I took my memories to the poppies today. It’s been five years since Gary went to heaven and I went for a drive to reflect on Gary’s life. The fields were pretty well finished blooming, except for a couple of little clumps here and there, but I didn’t know that when I left home. Turns out, the poppies would have little impact, as there were to be other blessings in store. Gary was allergic to poppies anyway! My day began with grabbing a water bottle, hand sanitizer and a mask, just in case. I filled my tank and headed out.
Once on the freeway, I turned off the ubiquitous and unsettling news and wondered what CD’s were loaded. I don’t think I’ve played a CD in the car for at least a year. I hit the Play button and to my surprise, one of our favorite albums began. It became a sweet reminder of so much as I drove north on the 14. By the third song, I had a smile on my face. (Click arrow to play, but you must open it in your browser if viewing from an email. There’s a link at the end of your email to “Read in browser”)
Day by day - Day by Day
Oh, Dear Lord three things I pray
To see thee more clearly
Love thee more dearly
Follow thee more nearly
Day by day
Truly, this was the cry of Gary’s heart, since he became a follower of Jesus and he inspired me to want to know Jesus better too.
I love Track 5. It’s taken from Psalm 103. It catalogues the benefits God freely gives to His children. I remember singing this song with Gary the year we got engaged. Those were such happy days, and we had so much fun goofing around together. Gary’s joy ran deep. Being a relatively new Christian compared to me, he inspired me to look at Jesus and the benefits of salvation with fresh eyes.
Oh bless the Lord my soul!
His praise to thee proclaim!
And all that is within me join,
To bless His holy name!
Oh bless the Lord my soul!
His mercies bear in mind!
Forget not all His benefits,
The Lord, to thee, is kind.
He will not always chide
He will with patience wait
His wrath is ever slow to rise
And ready to abate.
Oh bless the lord my soul!He pardons all thy sins
Prolongs thy feeble breath
He healeth thine infirmities
And ransoms thee from death.
He clothes thee with his love
Upholds thee with his truth
And like an eagle he renews
The vigor of thy youth.Then bless His holy name
Whose grace hath made thee whole
Whose love and kindness crowns thy days.
Oh bless the lord
Bless the lord my soul
Oh bless the lord my soul!
I know this album so well that I was already humming “All for the Best” as soon as Bless the Lord ended. The happy “vaudeville” type music almost makes you forget the wonderful and rather serious lyrics. I’ve commented on Gary’s contentment before, in fact it’s my favorite quality of his. No matter what difficulty he was encountering, he found his way to being content. It wasn’t always automatic, but he had his way of trusting God through anything.
Just look at the words before you listen to this very fast song. They remind me of David’s thoughts in Psalm 73.
When you feel sad…or under a curse
Your life is bad…Your prospects are worse
Your wife is sighing, crying
And your olive tree is dying.
Temples are graying!
And teeth are decaying!
Credit is weighing your purse!
Your mood and your robe…are both a deep blue.
You'd bet that Job…had nothing on you!
Ah, don't forget that when you get to Heaven you'll be blessed!
Yes, it's all for the best!Some men are born to live at ease, doing what they please, richer than the bees are in honey.
Never growing old, never feeling cold, pulling pots of gold from thin air!
The best in every town, best at shaking down, best making mountains of money.
They can't take it with them, but what do they care?
They get the center of the meat, cushions on the seat, houses on the street where it's sunny.
Summers at the sea, winters warm and free, all of this and we get the rest!
But who is the land for, the sun and the sand for?
You guessed, it's all for the best!
I believe I was driving safely when this next song ended, even though I had tears in my eyes. We chose “All Good Gifts” to be sung at our wedding. There was so much to be thankful and happy about that day. It’s easy to be thankful for God’s good gift of provision of our needs, and “all things bright and good.” and yet there’s nothing I can give to repay Him for the material and spiritual bounty He gave to us. All I have to offer is a “humble, thankful heart.” So enjoy with me this simple song of thanks.
(My necklace shows part of an etched note Gary wrote to me many years ago. Our daughters had it made for me to wear at Gary’s memorial service.)
We plow the fields and scatter the good seed on the land
But it is fed and watered by God's almighty hand.
He sends us snow in winter, the warmth to swell the grain
The breezes and the sunshine and soft refreshing rain.All good gifts around us, are sent from Heaven above
So thank the Lord, oh, thank the Lord for all His love.We thank Thee then, O Father, for all things bright and good
The seed time and the harvest, our life, our health, our food.
No gifts have we to offer for all Thy love imparts
But that which Thou desirest, our humble thankful hearts.All good gifts around us, are sent from Heaven above
So thank the Lord, oh, thank the Lord for all His love.
I went to the poppy fields to remember that my husband is in the presence of the Lord. Gary Price is fully righteous with no lingering sin to fight against, completely joyful with no sorrow that comes with parting or loss, energized with a perfect purpose, having much to do in order to serve, love and get to know his Savior better and better. God gives darker gifts too. Pain, loss, trials of all kinds. But I know this. Because God loved me, He saved me. He gave His Son to purchase me, pardon my sins and make me His own. He would therefore NEVER give me anything that is not good for me.
“He who did not spare His own Son, but delivered Him over for us all, how will He not also with Him freely give us all things?” Romans 8:32
The loss of Gary has caused many good gifts in my life. A closer relationship with Jesus, greater bond with family and friends, a longing for heaven, opportunities to help others, strengthened trust, revealing of idols in my heart, to name a few. “All good gifts around us are sent from heaven above.” So somewhere between Crown Valley and Palmdale, I did two things at once. (three if you count driving) I grieved the loss of my husband WHILE I was singing and thanking God for taking Gary away. I was reminded that nothing can steal my joy away, not even the loss of my precious best friend, Gary.
My prayer is
to “see Thee more clearly, love Thee more dearly, follow Thee more nearly, day by day.”
“For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor any other created thing, will be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” Romans 8:38-39
“…every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights…” James 1:17
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